Focus on Forever : Introducing Hang Doan

tanann

Mr. T & I learning how to fight nice;)

Greetings Everyone!  Hope you are doing wonderful on this beautiful Thursday.

Well, there has been something weighing on my heart for a very long time.  One of my many dreams was to compile inspirational love stories and create a book from them one day.  However, throughout the years, I would hear stories of new marriages on the brink of divorce, loveless marriages, or about marriages that ended.  This really broke my heart because I can totally relate in some way.  I am going to be honest, divorce has crossed my mind in challenging times of my marriage, but thank God it didn’t cross my heart.  I do believe in the power of prayer and I am thankful to my community for reminding me and helping me understand marriage, its purpose, and how a healthy (not perfect) one looks like.  I am fortunate enough to have a close friend, Hang Doan, help me through my difficult days.  And if it wasn’t for Hang, my parent’s marriage as a model, and a few other dear friends, I don’t believe I can grow and mature in this beautiful journey of marriage.  I am excited to say that Mr. T and I will be celebrating 11 years tomorrow November 13, 2015.  Trust me, it took a lot of hard work to celebrate 11 years;)

Hang with her husband Deacon Cuong.

Hang with her husband Deacon Cuong.

In hopes of creating more love stories for future generations to use as inspiration, I invited Hang on the blog to share her knowledge and experiences on preparing young couples for marriage.  And since most of you who visit the blog are Brides and Grooms-to-be…so perfect a place to share;)  Hang will be a guest blogger every other month to discuss different topics.  If you have any questions, feel free to ask below and Hang can answer them for you.  To start out the series “Focus on Forever,”  I wanted to introduce Hang so you can get to know her.  I asked her some questions, and she kindly replied….

YB: How did you start working in Marriage Preparation Classes? HD: Ever since my husband and I took the marriage prep course in 2003, I’ve always had in the back of my mind that one day I’d like to be involved in marriage ministry.

YB: How long ago did you start? HD: I started in 2007.

YB: What kept you motivated over the years? HD: Several things..

*I was encountering struggles in my own marriage and I knew if I were to overcome my own struggles, this ministry would help me do so.

*Working with the couples, I come to realize how much they needed to be ministered to.  I realized that I wasn’t alone in this struggle…what a relief!  I would share my own fears with the couples I worked with and I saw the relief in their eyes as to say “Wow! We’re not alone in this.”  This gave me the drive and desire to learn more and dive even deeper into the marriage ministry.

YB: Why do you feel it is important for couples to attend the classes?  HD: The marriage prep class is exactly that…It helps prepare the couples through the process of marriage planning and also life after the honeymoon and wedding day.  The discussions/group activities help couples open up and challenge them to ask themselves as well as each other — Is this what I want?  Is this the person I would like to walk with me for the rest of my life?

YB: Why is marriage important?  HD: Marriage is important because in marriage, we learn the true meaning of love…the unconditional, sacrificial love.  It is essentially the first place where we learn to love and have true relationships.  It is the primary place for education in life.  

YB: What is YOUR vision for marriage?  HD: This is a loaded question…very seldom do we see happy couples these days.  When I ask a couple to come volunteer or share in the the marriage class, couples tend to shy away citing that they are not good husbands or wives, they don’t have anything to share, etc.  My vision or my prayer for marriage is for couples to know and accept that marriage is difficult and work together as a team to overcome all struggles and obstacles.  In order to do so, each person must put the other’s needs before their own.  Through love and sacrifice, couples encounter Christ in each other and understand the true meaning of love.  

YB: Can you give some tips to young couples discerning marriage? HD: *Get to know yourself first. *Focus on being the right person first before expecting the other party to be perfect. *Know that in marriage, sacrifice is a necessity.  If you are not ready to sacrifice, perhaps you are not ready for marriage yet.  *Be open to compromise. 

Thank you Hang for answering all these questions.  I feel like I still have alot to learn in marriage and I can’t wait to read more of Hang’s sharing.  Look out for our sessions on “Focus on Forever”!

If you have any questions about marriage, feel free to ask.

Let’s go create everlasting marriages!

Ann

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4 thoughts on “Focus on Forever : Introducing Hang Doan

  1. This is a really great post Ann. My wife and I truly blessed to have a great marriage but we understand that it isn’t always like this for some couples and it’s heartbreaking to see. We once counseled some friends that were married but on the verge of divorce. Fortunately they worked out their issues and are happily married today but I recall the main issues they were dealing with were finances, lack of empathy for each other’s concerns, and lack of grace/forgiveness for each other. I see these to be reoccurring issues in troubled marriages.

    • Great to see you on here and thank you for reading John. You are on point with the issues and I see the same for couples facing challenges around me. We would really love it if you continue to join us in future discussions. We need to hear from a husband’s perspective too:)

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